Summer Wish List
NECC Professor Mark Palermo
mediocrity were not so politically expedient. My father
has always said, BS will get a man further in life
than talent. For proof, one need look no further
than Marty Midas Meehan, who went along,
broke promises, and spent his entire congressional career
railing against campaign finance abuses. Yet, in the end,
Midas drank more deeply from the poisoned cup of campaign
finance than any of his ethically-challenged colleagues.
Which brings me to my next wish:
I wish all lobbying were illegal, especially by foreign
governments. Lobbying is just another word for bribery.
How can we have a foreign policy in the best interests of
the American people when we allow China, Saudi Arabia,
Israel, Japan, and anyone else to buy into our
I wish Congress would take a lesson from Doors
drummer John Densmore, who refused a $15,000,000 offer
from Cadillac for the rights to use Break On
Through in the companys advertising
campaign. Densmore says the Doors music is not
for rent. (Jim wouldnt approve) The Doors had
more talent, passion, and artistic integrity than any
other rock group- then and now.
I wish U.N. observers were called in to monitor all
future public works projects in Haverhill. Then, maybe it
wouldnt take six years to replace an 800-foot
bridge through the center of town.
I wish Howie Carr, AKA Howie, the Jackal,
avowed Nemesis of immigrants -illegal and otherwise-
would find one good thing to say about one immigrant. Any
immigrant will do. The image of Howie in the act of
praise is somehow inconceivable, maybe even
surrealistic. Like George Bush dancing the
Macarena. Or Dick Cheney reading Allen Ginsbergs
poem, Howl, in some smoky, waterfront tavern.
I wish the people of the United States would stand
against torture, secret detentions and similar abuses for
which we condemned the Nazis at Nuremburg. We are a
nation of laws, not of men.
I wish the government would allow a full tax deduction
for those who pay their own medical insurance.
I wish so-called conservative columnist, Ann the
Cruel Nun Coulter would practice civility and
restraint, which are the hallmarks of democracy. Every
time the shrewish Coulter speaks, she makes conservatism
look more like fascism.
I wish there were an enforced anti-noise ordinance in
Haverhill. We shouldnt have to legislate common
sense, respect and consideration, but we must.
I wish we had National Orgasm Day here as they do in
Brazil. The town of Esperantina, whose residents are
deeply religious and conservative, hosts the annual event
dedicated to the health giving benefits of orgasm,
within a committed relationship of course. Esperantinas
mayor, Felipe Santolia says, Ive seen
scientific studies that show when a woman is unloved,
when her husband can bring her to orgasm, it affects all
aspects of her life, her relationships with her children,
at home, with the city and at work. The event
features panel discussions by sex therapists on topics
like premature ejaculation. Is America ready for this?
Orgasms are important to all nations, but we must proceed
with discretion. Like Nixon opening up China in 1972,
only a prominent Republican with stature and gravitas can
initiate National Orgasm Day. This is a job for Dick
I wish Ron Paul were the Republican presidential
candidate, but look for him to be marginalized and
excluded from the debate by any means necessary. Paul is
too interesting and forthright. Apparently, I am not the
only one who thinks so. A Google search of his name
rendered 48 million hits, while a search for so-called
frontrunners Mitt Romney and Rudy Giuliani rendered a
paltry 2 million hits each. If other Republican
candidates look wooden and scripted next to Ron Paul,
thats because they are all shills in service to the
New World Order.
I wish the media would refrain from the childishly na´ve
practice of referring to those who doubt the official
version of 9/11 as conspiracy theorists.
As if there were never a conspiracy in this country or
anyplace else. Polls repeatedly indicate the vast
majority of Americans believe the government covered up
the facts of 9/11. The conspiracy belongs to those who
have concocted the lie, not those who perceive it.
I wish the Tribune would stop referring to those who want
to vote on gay marriage as anti-gay. Theres
nothing anti-gay about letting the people decide. An end
run around the democratic process may achieve an
important short-term objective for gay people. On the
other hand, winning hearts and minds by persuasion and
discourse is the democratic way. In the words of Thomas
if we think them (the citizens)
not enlightened enough to exercise their control with a
wholesome discretion, the remedy is not to take it from
them, but to inform their discretion by education.
Massachusetts state reps take notice.
Mark Palermo is a professor at Northern Essex
Community College in Haverhill. You can email him at firstname.lastname@example.org.
*Send your questions comments to ValleyPatriot@aol.com
The July 2007 Edition of
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